The Hobbit Movie is No Lord of the Rings

First, it seems strange to write about a movie with the senseless deaths at the elementary school in Connecticut.  My thoughts and prayers and deepest condolences go out to the families grieving there.  Perhaps more on that later.

My wife and I saw Peter Jackson's "The Hobbit" this afternoon.  I am a big Tolkien fan and loved the Lord of the Rings movies.  At the end of Fellowship and Two Towers I looked at the time and couldn't believe it had been three hours - it just flew by.  Return of the King felt a little longer, but was no where near what I experienced today.

The Hobbit is a long movie, and it feels long.  In LOTR, Jackson brought in a little of the back story from the Silmarillion (which is a complete history of Middle Earth, and reads like a dusty history book...) to add some needed context and the Aragorn/Arwen love story.  In The Hobbit, Jackson brings in far too much, and invents far too much. Somewhere around the two and a half hour mark, I was wondering, "is this movie ever going to end?"

My biggest beef is that he deviated from the book in far too many places.  I don't want to spoil the movie, but Bilbo's wonderful discussion with Gandalf at the beginning, Bilbo's self-conflicted, passionate arguing for himself to go, the meeting with the mountain trolls, the council at Rivendell, how they escaped the goblins (and Bilbo's escape), and the birdies in the trees scenes were all changed at a fundamental level.  The main villain in the movie isn't even in the book!

For parents, this movie is much more violent than LOTR.  Jackson went overboard in adjusting a children's tale for adult consumption.  LOTR was dark and scary, but the books were dark and scary (although not as much as the movies).  The Hobbit should have had a lot more humor and a lot less violence.  One of the brilliant moves in the LOTR movies was keeping most of the original dialogue intact, but it loses that in The Hobbit.

The Lord of the Rings trilogy is about the triumph of compassion, friendship and love over evil.  The Hobbit is about Bilbo growing up and experiencing the world beyond his Hobbit hole.  I didn't get that from this movie at all.

So, rather than making two great movies about the Hobbit, Peter Jackson has decided to make three mediocre movies, leaving the heart of the book in the screen writer's wastebasket.  (I suppose three movies makes more money than two...)  Omitting "The Cleansing of the Shire" from Return of the King was bad enough, but omitting the basic story from the Hobbit is worse.  Didn't they learn their lesson from the Narnia movies, especially Dawn Treader?  When you radically alter the premise, you lose the heart of the book, and so with it, its loyal fans.

Jeff's Pinewood Derby Speed Tips

1.  First and most important, this is the boys' race!  Help them understand what works and why, but let them get their hands dirty and make mistakes.  That's how we learn.  Tigers can sand and paint.  Wolves can start using coping saws.  Bears can learn to use a drill press with supervision.  Webelos can start learning laser guided CNC milling machines...  There is an anything goes race for parents who just have to build a car, and kids that want to bend (or break) the rules.

2.  The car's weight is the engine.  5 ounces is the max, so use it.  Why would you run a 4 cylinder car at 2.5 oz. against V-8s at 5 oz?  The higher the weight is on the track at start and the more weight you have, the greater the potential energy.  Be careful, though - if the car is too tail heavy, you'll have stability issues causing braking.  The center of gravity (balance point) of the car should be about 1" in front of the back axle.  Remove as much wood up front as possible so you can add more weight in back where it counts.  Dense materials make the best, most compact weights.  Remember that lead isn't good for kids, so you handle that part of it.  Some people opt for Tungsten, but it's really expensive and you don't gain that much.  Also, tungsten putty and tungsten powder are actually less dense than lead.

3.  Friction makes up the brakes.  Think of everywhere the wheels rub.  Against the axles, against the side of the car, against the side of the track rail.  Polish the tires (but don't modify them - that's illegal).  Take a needle file and get rid of any burrs on the axle.  Polish the axle with increasing grades of wet/dry sandpaper.  Use a good dry lube (liquid is illegal!)  Hobby lube is good and widely available.  Remember that all four wheels must touch the track!  Three-wheeling, though a good speed trick, is illegal!

4.  Stability makes a fast car.  Weebles wobble, but they lose races.  Get those axles absolutely square in the axle slots.  If you have bad slots, flip the block over and cut them in square with a doubled up hacksaw blade.  However, the slots must be the original distance apart (4 3/8").  Long wheel bases are illegal in Pinewood Derby (but really help for those of you who do AWANA Grand Prix).  Before you glue the axles, make sure the car rolls straight on a level, smooth surface (e.g. kitchen table).  Turning axles in the slots a little at a time can help align the wheels and get the car tracking straight.

5. Sleek and smooth (aerodynamics) has less to do with it than you think, but a well designed car following the tips above will end up pretty sleek.  I tell my kids to focus on either making it cool (competing for design and creativity), or making it fast.  The Oscar-Meyer Weiner Mobile, even though cool, doesn't make for a fast design, even though applying some of the other tips here can still make it faster.

A fast car is built from a dozen little speed enhancements, each giving just a little more edge.

Surf the Internet (there are links in another post from 2010), do research, do math, conduct advanced particle physics experiments, but remember, it's your son's car.  If he does his best and has a sense of accomplishment when we're done, everyone wins.

Does anyone have a 3 1/2 oz. sphere of spent Uranium-235 laying around that I can have for my engine?

Amazing Cups and Balls Variation

So this is how...

For the Undecided

For those who are undecided, who need a little nudge in the right direction, or even for those who somehow believe that Obama has been good for our nation:

From Townhall.com

Election Prediction

Popular Vote:  Romney wins by at least 2%, despite massive voter fraud and intimidation by the Democrats.*

Electoral College:  Romney receives 300+ electoral college votes.

Senate:  Republicans have 50 seats, with VP Ryan as the tie-breaking vote.

The real questions then will be how conservative Congress will actually be, whether they can hold moderate Romney's feet to the fire, and whether they repeal Obamacare as promised, or whether Romney decides to play nice (and foolish) and "replace" Obamacare by simply modifying it.  I'm praying for a one page bill introduced on day one that simply says, "the Affordable Care Act is hereby repealed."

In any case, I only expect that the Republicans in the next two years will put economic band-aids on the arterial bleed that is deficit spending, slowing the inevitable, but not  ultimately avoiding it.

Pray for our nation!  Pray for Romney to turn from Mormonism to faith in the real, Biblical Jesus.  Pray that Obama doesn't do too much more damage on his way out.  Pray!

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*  Yes, some Republicans also engage in voter fraud, but with the Democrats it's endemic and blatant in urban areas.

Obamanation

Click on the picture to go to McNaughton's for the interactive version.  There are over 60 links to news articles with facts about Obama's record as president.  The YouTube video, below, describes the artwork and the link.

Obama is beyond a failure as a president.  He has not earned re-election.  Vote Ryan-Romney.