Monday, August 10, 2009

Democrat, Republican or Texan?














I got this in an email at work today, and couldn't pass up posting it!

Are you a Democrat, a Republican or a Texan? The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Colt 1911 cal. 45 semiautomatic pistol, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

(Image courtesy of Xavier Thoughts)

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THINK CAREFULLY:
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Democrat's Answer:
  • Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
  • Does the man look poor or oppressed?
  • Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
  • Could we run away?
  • What does my wife think?
  • What about the kids?
  • Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
  • What does the law say about this situation?
  • Does the Colt have appropriate safety built into it?
  • Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
  • Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
  • If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
  • Should I call 9-1-1?
  • Why is this street so deserted?
  • We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
  • This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.
...................................................
Republican's Answer:
  • BANG!
...................................................


Texan's Answer:
  • BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!* Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
  • BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click

  • Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester SilverTips or Hollow Points?'
  • Son: 'Can I shoot the next one!'
* Note: the original email only had 9 bullets in the 1911 before reloading. The 1911 magazine holds 10. Actually a real Texan would load up 10+1. Also, there would be no "click" when the gun was empty because the slide would lock back and the hammer would be unable to drop, thus no "click". A competent handgunner would also be counting rounds expended and rounds remaining, so the second magazine would be on it's way to the gun immediately after the 11th round (10+1) was fired.**

** The previous note confirms that I am a gun geek. :o}

1 comment:

Keith Walker said...

If you are going to count your round, then reload at 10 instead of 11. This way you do not have to worry about releasing the slide again and you keep one in the chamber.